Oct 142013
 

I was pulling on a crocheted beanie this morning, because it was cold out and because I was going to venture into public (read: go to the local lab for my weekly blood test for warfarin), and it occurred to me that over a year ago I had nicely bobbed hair. Shampoo was necessary. Trims were necessary. And roughly six months before everything went tits-up, I was still wearing very long braids and thoroughly sick of that weight on my neck. No dye or henna or anything needing touch-ups, just simple hair like mom had.

Speaking of mom, Happy Birthday, Susan :)

Hair is one of those things which connects me to mom. Her hair was long enough to sit on when I was born and she took to pinning it up because I took to trying to climb up her back using it like rope. Dark blonde flecked with gray. She had it pinned up until I got my hair cut right before 7th grade. When she went to the same hairdresser she said ‘no thanks!’ when he offered to braid it and save the braid for her. Short hair suited her, and she started dyeing it red. When I had a tail in the back like a lot of 80s kids, she’d share some of her dye and I was this little blonde with a strawberry tail. Which was as punk as she allowed in 1982. Then high school happened and I had an asymmetrical skater cut, which was by turns tinted purple (baby goth, ha), fire engine red, carrot red, burgundy, etc. Skater cut, then bobbed.

As the peach fuzz s-l-o-w-l-y grows, the thing I miss is fidgeting with my hair. Not out of vanity so much as fun. I’m thinking skater cut when it is long enough to trim :)

 

How is it that I was using this software easily for several years, and now cannot get the version I’m familiar with to crop a .jpg? *piss and moan, piss and moan*

 

I had a strong tendency to divide myself physically from religious faith, before getting sick. And looking back it kind of contradicts a lot of experiences I’ve had in the past five years. Sympathetic magic and practice. Common sense stuff like brewing tea to literally heal oneself, making the kitchen stove into an ad hoc magic workspace. Cooking to heal loved ones. Walking prayers to Hekate every morning back when I was still working, on my way to work each morning, just to be able to start what might be a lackluster day on a positive and confident note. And then magic worked for loved ones needing help, and knowing what was needed and why and how to complete workings.

Then cancer hit and I was temporarily adrift. It is only in the past six months or so that dreaming as I previously knew it has returned, rife with symbols and questions which spawn further questions. Over a year ago, dreaming was strictly hemispheric, depending on which side of my head was on the pillow. Something which has been driven home in various literal and figurative ways is there’s a unifying aspect if one reaches into the ethers or deep into one’s psyche in order to aid physical healing. I realized that it is just as useful to work with Saints as it is Gods/Goddesses and Spirits (be they plant, animal, or element.) My body knows what it needs, and I finally learned to bridge this practically. I’m not Catholic, but have found that saying rosary is very useful for focusing intent and leaning into the Mother for support. I’ve learned to appeal to St. Martin de Porres on my own behalf (he’s also analogous to Eleggua, who is the figure at the crossroads, which is also an aspect of Hekate.) And I have no problem lighting a Helping Hand candle. If I want to meditate I’ll play chants composed by Hildegard von Bingen.

I’ve gotten more deeply into hoodoo practice. No, let’s rephrase that… As time goes by, I learn that I’ve been practicing some form of hoodoo for as long as I can remember, which is why it is easy to glide over to Saints and Orishas. Instinct and culture growing up, methinks :)

Coming back to myself mentally after radiation treatment, made a salad bowl of practices into a cohesive stew, for which I am most thankful.

 

 

Since I’m working on the dood’s former computer, which has been upgraded to Win 7 (very very functional thus far), I had a really massive file transfer to make from my old machine. One of the biggest files contained more TrueType fonts than you can shake a stick at. I finally went thru everything, deleting at least 50 fonts which I deemed less-than-useful, while keeping and installing around 100 that’ll be plenty useful for graphics and such. Only one I seem to have missed is the one with all the nifty-o alchemy symbols. Actually, the Mayan script one is gone, too.

Just need to relearn Macromedia Fireworks so I can start playing again. I was working on a graphic for wedding invitations an hour ago and had to just take a break. Hunger was making me swear at the software, which is never helpful. After a bowl of spicy ramen with an egg cooked into it, I am starting to feel human again :) Now to just insert text in the font I want…

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